The Sweetest Good Night

Time is moving so quickly,
Passing me by so swiftly.
It’ll all be over soon anyway,
So what difference does it make if I leave today?
I’ve lived enough life.
Been bruised, battered and chewed up by strife.
30 years really is a long time.
I think I can see enough from this vantage point
To know it’s not getting any better,
That this isn’t some storm I can just weather.
This is my life: A soul steeped in sadness,
Aching with loneliness, self-hatred and madness.
I’ve always been too scared to jump from up high,
Too afraid of failure and ridicule to pull the trigger on life,
But I think i this may be it –
The chance to really take charge of my life.

Bliss

This third floor apartment
Ain’t gettin’ me any closer to the stars,
But I feel as though
My feet are so far off the ground
And I’m still scared
Of heights.
I’ve been swallowing tacks,
Biting my tongue
And holding out hope
That something good will prevail.
Where to turn, what to do –
Questions are out-pacing answers
These days
And I’m weary,
Blistering
In search of bliss.

Breathe to Dream

Writing helps me breathe
Like carbon for the trees
I take the bad
And turn it into good
Internalize it all
Just like you knew I would.

Trees and birds passing notes
I’ve got this place that no one knows
They’ll never find us there
So leave behind your worldly cares.
This is where yours and mine,
They can unite
And all our dreams can finally fly.

Confidence

Is confidence a choice?
A conscious decision to silence
The voices that run rampant,
Party with a penchant,
Taking much more than their share.

Is taking the staircase
All I need to do
To escape this self-despair?
Can I climb out from this basement
That knows no sunlight
If only I’m wise and brave enough to realize:
There is still a place where the sun shines.

I think that maybe – just maybe – confidence is but a choice,
A conscious decision to silence my inner critic’s voice.

Bridging the Gaps

We can build this bridge together
And let the water flow below
It doesn’t matter where the tide turns
So long as we both know
All that is behind us
No need to dredge it up
We can bail ourselves out
With our overflowin’ cups

Life has given us this gift
So let’s not turn away,
Instead, turn our faces to the sun
And live a better way

(11:43pm July 4, 2010)

Port

I feel the island waves
Pulling me back to that place
Where we all lived
Givin’ what we had to give
Livin’ on a Canadian dream
Takin’ life for hard as it seemed
Lookin’ back on all that now,
I can’t help but laugh out loud –
We were so young
And so quick to come undone.

Together we built a legacy
That will last as long
As the deep of the sea
There ain’t no turnin’ back
Though I wish that
We could all live and replay
Those carefree days.

(Wednesday, July 7, 2010)

The Edge

This seems a fitting poetic offering for the changing of the calendar year.

I’m sitting at the edge,
Where the sea & city meet,
I am unendingly grateful
For the life at my feet

Ain’t no cause for complaining
When the world’s so good to you.
If you stop long enough to listen,
No doubt you’ll find this true.

I hope you find health, happiness & laughter
Every way you turn,
And that the lessons in your life
Aren’t too hard to learn.

(3:03pm Friday, February 27, 2009)

Mine

This is who I used to be
The girl you never got to see
I’m reclaiming a piece
At a time
No more trying to please
Any needs but mine.

(Friday, July 2nd, 2010)

Rain

The rain sings me its lullaby,
No stars in the mid-night sky
As I lay in my bed and close my eyes

(January 8, 2010)

Overgrown

I feel a tightening in my soul
Seems my heart is overgrown
Can your love set me free
Break on in, and we’ll soon see

(2:17pm Thursday, November 4, 2010)